August 1st, 2010

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Oh My God, it was in MY HOUSE

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.

I got home after helping some friends move. I had intended to take a quick shower, but got sidetracked talking to my roommate, Becky. At one point she says "What is that rustling noise?"

She peaks behind the couch and says, "Melissa go to your room!"

And I'm like, "W\hy?"

Because there was a snake caught on one of our glue traps for the mice. We immediately went down the hall and hid in her room, trying to figure out what to do. Becky called everyone - pest control, the condo management company, friends, friends of friends - everyone was either away or couldn't come until tomorrow. Deanna showed up for moral support, bless her, but she was just as freaked out as we were.

Not knowing what we had, I decided I'd try and see if I could take the advice of the pest control guy - and pick it up with my mouse-grabber arm and drown it in a bucket. I got the bucket, moved the couch, steeled my reserve and looked at the snake.

I then ran down the hall and hyperventillated a bit. It was big and it had clearly moved since Becky saw it last.

By this time Becky was on the phone with 911, and it seems like one of the cops who got the call was curious enough to come or was sent over, I'm not sure. Whatever it was that got him here, I am grateful. He came in, assuring us that it was just a grass snake or what he called a little "Racer." He took one look at the snake and said something like, "Holy Jesus."

What then followed was the cop getting the snake into a box - glue trap and all - which was difficult because the snake had wound himself around the cable wires, trying to get free. We then waited for animal control - me, Becky, Deanna for a bit, even our downstairs neighbor - also named Becky.

The cop, Officer Bergquist, was really nice, and I am so glad he got that snake in a box. He had us Google the snake and kept saying, "I don't want to say what it is, but I think I know, or I guess." The picture he thought it identified with? A BOA CONSTRICTOR.

Becky and I freaked out. Neighbor Becky and Deanna eventually departed. When Animal Control guy showed up about an hour after the cop he popped open the lid of the box, picked it up and said, "Yup, that's a pet." And then confired with the cop that, yes, in fact, it was a boa. Literally, they stood at the computer screen, Animal Control Guy with the glue-trapped snake in his hands, and compared the picture to the live thing.

Cop and Animal Control Guy soon departed, and Becky and I (Mostly me) FREAKED OUT a bit more.  BECAUSE THERE WAS A BOA CONSTRICTOR IN MY HOUSE!!!!!!!

I am trying to return to normal now - but there was a BOA CONSTRICTOR in MY HOUSE!

Sorry for all the capital letters - an hour and half later, that's still what's going through my head - just one screamed line - OH MY GOD THERE WAS A BOA CONSTRICTOR IN MY HOUSE!!!!!!"

I am attempting not to freak out, but it isn't going so well.